The power of choice is one of the greatest gifts we are given. In fact, it is so important that the privilege of choice is removed from prison inmates as a form of punishment. Although we make many choices every hour of the day, we rarely make neutral choices. Each choice has a positive or negative consequence for us at some level.
Our ability to choose is a gift, but it is also a huge responsibility. No matter what today's "it's not my fault" culture encourages, we are all ultimately responsible for our own choices. In fact, I like to write the word "responsibility" as response-ability. As humans, we have the unique ability to respond. It is a choice we make, although many times an instantaneous or subconscious choice.
Here's a scenario repeated daily. Family dinners are important at the Smith house. Jim and Jane Smith and their two children (Jonnie, age 3 and Janie, age 4) have just seated themselves at the table. Before the first bite of dinner is enjoyed, Jonnie spills his milk and it goes everywhere.
A reaction to this event: "Not again, Jonnie! Every time we eat, this happens. Think, son, think! Do you want to eat in your room from now on?"
A response to this event: "Uh Oh, Jonnie. Let's get a sponge and clean this up so you can eat your dinner."
When you react, you make a purely emotional and subconscious decision. Often, because of how your experiences and prior choices have programmed your subconscious mind, your reactions do not help you achieve the best results.
On the other hand, when you respond to a situation, you make a constructive and conscious decision. That's why there are Emergency Response Teams not Emergency Reaction Teams:
When you simply react, your emotional instinct is in control, with little thought of the long-range consequences.
When you respond, your brain is fully engaged and your self-awareness is high. You have the long-term consequences in mind.
We all experience plenty of negative situations and people. The key is to be prepared to consciously respond to these negative inputs. Choosing to respond instead of react helps us to positively orchestrate our attitudes...and our lives.
The left side of the script is the side of choice. Each of us chooses our thoughts, words, and actions either consciously or subconsciously. Therefore, we influence the right side of the script—the side of responsibility. We must take responsibility for our beliefs, commitments, and results. We are each responsible for the choices we make and the results we ultimately achieve.
The ultimate choice is ours—victim or victor?
The choice is ours. So, whose responsibility is it anyway?
Learn more about getting the best from yourself and others from the rapid-read book, Orchestrating Attitude.
